July 22, 2008

Daisy Pukes starts her 'tour'

I'm sorry to admit it, but I'm still on Team Lachey, and bitter. Jessica Simpson ruined my thanksgiving 3 years ago when her dad leaked announced they were splitting up. Since then, she seems like such a lost lil soul, turning into a Chamelion with the boys she started dating afterwards. First it was the "all night boozehound partier" when being romanced by Bam Margera & Adam Levin of Maroon 5 (anyone remember that pic of her doing the walk of shame from his hotel? That was one of US Weekly's finest hours) Then it was her "grunge" stage with "o Face" John Mayer- first off- does going brunette mean you turn grunge?!? I think not. And now its her All American Country Gal dream appearance, while dating All American boy Tony Romo. So. Frickin. Cute. Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

And when the homecoming king and queen broke up for that brief period of time?

Yeah- I totally pictured Nick Lachey sitting on his couch, drinking a Miller Light, browsing through an US Weekly Cover Story of his ex and chuckling that he doesn't have to deal with Papa Joe anymore. Only to have Vanessa come back with more Miller Light asking him to put on the Red Sox game. (hey- this is my day dream, not yours)

While this post was supposed to be about how she got booed during her first appearance as a "Country Star" this past weekend in Wisconsin, it really turned into a tribute, of the rise and fall of a Blonde Pop Icon (oh shush.. us brunettes have Amy Winehouse). I will leave you with the most profound quote during all of my extensive research for this piece.

"She doesn't fit in with country, and I'll have to drink a lot of beer to sit through her concert."- one concert goer in WI. [source and concert image]

Just as long as he makes that beer a...

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11 comments:

WeezerMonkey said...

I loved Newlyweds. Her idiocy was legendary.

Golightly said...

I miss the old Jessica (circa Newlyweds) she was so fun. And you are so right she does change personality to fit with beau of the moment. Gah - country, she needs to get back to her real roots, bubblegum pop star.

jamie said...

I agree--Team Lachey all the way. Ha-it would take a lot of Miller Lite for me to sit through her concert, too! :)

brookem said...

I'm totally with you- I have been on Team Nick too!

John and Jess never made sense to me. He seems too.... quirky and intelligent for her. I like him and Jen though, I think?

Sarah said...

I am SO Team Lachey and always have been. I loved Newlyweds and really wanted her to be a better wife to him. Now I will hate her forever and always. Perhaps that's because many people have called my husband the missing Lachey brother. But seriously, I so enjoy any hardships she has...because I'm evil.

Katelin said...

jessica really has morphed with each boyfriend she's had after nick, verrrry interesting.

and love that concert goer quote, haha. i can't imagine her singing country, shudder.

R said...

She and Brit are both tragic in their own ways. And similar ways too.

KT said...

i can't stand her. she's such a stupid slut.

Maxie said...

I'm team lache too. I feel like she's going to keep trying genres and styles until she finds something that fits... which will be NEVER

emrlds said...

i'm team nick lachey. his brother? kind of a tool. sadly, i can only support half of the family, haha.
but chicken of the sea? still shaking my head at that one.

Playful Professional said...

I heard her song the other day on the radio and at first I thought there is no way this is Jessica Simpson. Would she really be trying country now? I'm a huge country star but I definitely will not be going to that tour.